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Guys--How to tell if she's really INTO you


Dating & Relating

Attention, men! 4 signs that she's into you
By Matt Christensen

You’re at a bar. You notice a woman. She notices you. You move closer, drink in hand. She tosses her hair and crosses her legs. Does it mean anything? You bet. Is it a good sign? Could be. More than 70% of communication between humans is non-verbal, meaning you can learn a lot, and save yourself from potential embarrassment, just by watching a potential love interest. Check out these things you can tell about a woman before she even says word one.

Clue #1: She’s all decked out
What you can tell: According to Patti Wood, body language expert and professional speaker, a woman’s appearance can translate into how much attention she needs, and is willing to give. “When a woman takes care of herself, men assume she’ll be able to take care of them,” she says. That’s the upside. “But if her appearance is perfectly flawless, that is the standard she’ll measure you by,” explains Kevin Hogan, Ph.D., and author of Irresistible Attraction: Secrets of Personal Magnetism. Are you up for the challenge? Because she may well be one high-maintenance woman.

Clue #2: She licks her lips
What you can tell: “There is a certain kind of lip-licking that means she’s interested,” says Wood. “Look for a slow movement of just the upper part of the tongue across the lips. A woman has to make an effort to do that, so it’s very come-hither.” John South, from Charleston, WV, has used the lip-licking theory to his advantage. “There was a woman at a bar who looked at me and then licked her lips,” he explains. “So, I went over to her and asked her if she needed some ChapStick. She knew I caught her, and she was a little embarrassed, but she told me she was glad I came over.”

Clue #3: She tosses her hair
What you can tell: “Any kind of preening is a woman’s attempt to get noticed,” Wood explains. One particularly good sign: “If she flips her hair back with her wrist exposed, she’s opening herself up to you.” In fact, any exaggerated hair toss (as opposed to a quick sweep of the bangs to get them out of the way), is a positive thing. Chase Massingill, of Queens, NY, says the hair toss has been a good indicator that a woman is interested in him. “One night at a party, I noticed this beautiful woman looking at me, then she looked away and flipped her hair back,” he explains. “I went to talk to her and later found out from one of her friends that she’d been eyeing me all night.”

Clue #4: Her feet face you
What you can tell: “Where the feet go, the heart follows,” explains Wood. “If a woman is into you, the bottom portion of her body will face you. If her lower body is turned away, chances are it’s not shyness, it’s a lack of interest.” Most women have been taught to be polite, so they may turn to face you with their upper bodies, observes Wood. “But the lower body is what separates attraction from civility. Even when she’s talking to other guys, if her feet are pointed toward you, she’s interested. It’s a very good indicator.”

Now that you know how to decode body language, get out there and use this info to approach the women who are interested in you… and not bother with those who aren’t.

Matt Christensen has written for Maxim and The Cleveland Plain Dealer.


Posted: 7:46 AM, Dec. 8, 2005

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