May. 28, 2006 - stupid tears

i need to toughen up. yep thats what i need.

  i started crying last night and puds place and i really dont think he knows why. its the stupidest reason really.  i dont blame him if he hates me for being so emotional.anyways the reason i cried is because sometimes i feel l ike our relationship doesnt mean that much to him. its stupid why i thought it tho. it was just because he was planning to run off to the navy (leaving me behind with what seems like not even a little hesitation) but as soon as his sister says she disaproves, he practically forgets the idea. for some reason that hurt. but as much as id like to stop him leaving to do whatever he wants to do, id never stop him. because i want him to be happy. and thats the main thing

 *sigh* even if his happyness meant me being sad. i'd still support him 100% because thats what loves about i guess